Six Women Exposed A Fuckboy In A Real-Life ‘John Tucker Must Die’ Revenge Plot

Listen up y’all, lend me your ears. Or eyes. Whatever. Give me your organs by which you consume written information, for I am about to regale you with an epic revenge narrative. Six female heroes who should be put into the Feminist Hall Of Fame( note to fellow womankind: generate Feminist Hall of Fame) get retaliation on a fuckboy in truly epic style. Sorry I had to use a vocabulary throwback from 2004, but truly there is no other way to describe this.

It all started when our homegirl-who-doesn’t-know-she’s-our-homegirl Lisette get set up on a bad date by her friends. As one does.

Okay so like first of all, who are these so-called friends? Why would you define your girl up with some dude, merely to text her “GET OUT” before the date even happens? WTF is wrong with you? I sincerely hope these “friends” got a thorough roasting of the working group chat and their set-up privileges were revoked. But for the purposes of this story I’m delighted to see that didn’t happen preemptively, otherwise we wouldn’t get this incredible tale.

That’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see how it plays out for him.

Now this is a girl you’d want to meet drunk in a bathroom. But await, because it gets better. Grab some wine, grab some popcorn, it’s about to be lit.

Someone should have told this dude this kind of shit only works on

It’s beautiful. It’s majestic. It’s a narrative as old as time: girls uniting against the common fuckboy. Except await. It’s not over. I fucking “ve told you” all it was illuminate, and I was not over-promising.

I suppose I speak for all of us when I say YASSS QUEENS.

Wow. What a wild and crazy ride that was. I, like you, patently have many questions, but I’ll stick with the most pressing ones. First, what’s this guy’s first and last name? Asking for a friend . that actually volumes FIVE dates in one night? What was his end game if he liked one of the girls or one was down to smash-up? Second, how rich is this guy that he can front five dates in one single night, or is he that much of a fuckboy that he’d make all the girls pay? Eventually, what was his reaction upon seeing this? I’m just waiting for the “It Was Just A Joke, You Women Are So Sensitive” follow-up article from this douchecanoe. If you or anyone you know has the answers to these questions, please let us know ASAP.

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