Code red everybody. Chris Harrison just revealed the casting for Rachel Lindsays season of and WE HAVE SOME PREDICTIONS.
Harrison has been pestering the release all week, and now all of Americais stocking up on wine, Doritos and comfy PJs to hunker down and get. Into. This.Ish.
The list of men is nothing if not beautiful, and while Im sure there will be ups and downs, hearts won and hearts broken, I have a theory or two about who our front runners are going to be.
For the first time ever, we’re announcing Rachel’s humen right hereLIVE with Chris Harrison! #TheBachelorette premieres MONDAY at 9 |8 c on ABC!
Posted by The Bachelorette on Wednesday, May 17, 2017
Based entirely on the vain characteristics of looks, career, age and literally nothing else, here is who we believe is likely to be the top fighting for Rachels heart.
The Wild Card Jonathan, 31, Tickle Monster
Anyone willing to go on national television and proclaim themselves the Tickle Monster is OBVIOUSLY in it to win it.
Sure it could totally backfire, and theres a 50/50 chance hes a psychopath with a weird tickle fetish, but it could also be that he is doing anything he can to stand out and separate himself from the pack.
Mr. History Fred, 27, Executive Assistant
Talk about strategy and having an superstar card in your back pocket. Fred actually had Rachel as a camp counselor, which means what? Anybody? MEMORIES. SHARED EXPERIENCE. CONNECTION.
Plus, his name is Fred, and I cant think of one Fred Ive gratified that I didnt like.
Classic Prince Charming Bryce, 30, Firefighter
Cant go wrong with a classic tall darknes and handsome glass of water. Literally.
Is there a more firefighter-y name than Bryce? No. Is there a more Bryce-y appearing guy than this? No. Is his jaw line something to marvel? Yes.
If Rachel wants somebody to throw her over her shoulder and defend her honor, shes got it.
Of course, massive upsets, tie-in breakers and overtime are all possible in video games of, and theres no guarantee any of these men will walk away with the last rose.
Im on the DL placing my gambles on Tickle Monster, and cant wait to tune into the premiere Monday night on ABC.